"...or falling out of the wheel-well at altitude..."
It's impossible to fall out with the wheel retracted and the door closed, but to the real point of this whole misadventure.
"Cameras everywhere on every base, you cant smoke a cigarette without someone in a room knowing about it."
That's exactly the case here with the kid showing up on video... twice in different locations. OK, who was sitting in security and supposed to be watching the monitors?
I lost my job today:
https://www.google.com/search?q=i+lo...ih=832&dpr=0.9