Oh, way down yonder in the pumpkin patch
On Halloween night, I got my first snatch
In and Out
In and Out
In and Out
Pumpking patch.

Chorus:

Oh, I wish I was humpin' pumpkins
All Day
All Night
We'll have a swingin' time in the pumpkin patch
With all those pumpkins humpin'
All Day
All Night
I wish I was humpin' pumpkins.

Oh the Great Pumpking is a whiz at ####in'
Look at all those little pumpkins.
Look around
Look around
Look around
Bastard pumpkins.

(Chorus)