http://www.metro.co.uk/news/880412-g...-she-had-no-id
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Damn Zealous Nazi Bastards.
Flamboyant booze selling twit
Go Granny, Go Granny, Go Granny Go! (Beach Boys)
FYI Beach Boys is also correct, Jan and Dean in 1964 and on the Beach Boys Concert album also in 1964. The album includes several songs that The Beach Boys regularly performed live but had not previously included on an album.
And everybody's sayin' that she's drunk as a sailor
The little old lady known as Diane Taylor
She drinks real hard and she drinks to excess
She's the terror of Harlow Essex
Do I look 18 to you? Aaaawwww, thank you but I'm just well preserved... eeehhh... pickled.
I don't know. Judging from her picture she looks like she might be well under 18.
Well, she finds you to be a real cutie John, you should hook up.
She might even leave her librarian glasses on.
eat it John.
Well, if old people want to be treated just like younger people... I mean, we can't revoke a person's license because "Well, the definitely look old!"
Years ago, there used to be a very special race up at Penn State during Greek Week. It was called the Phi Psi 500... it was a race that included stops at 6 bars between the start & finish lines, at you had to chug a drink at each bar (your choice, beer or Coke. You can guess what most people picked). The race as I knew it is long gone, but never mind that...
The Penn State ARC was often asked to provide communications between start/finish and the bars. Yes, there were problems with drunks, and the crowd, and so forth. Anyway, this one year, I'm stationed in a dive of a bar called the Rathskelller. The bouncers were carding everyone who walked in, and yes, the Pa LCB had agents present, so they dared not screw around. And this I witnessed:
Some wise-ass alumni, with his spouse or SO, clearly in his late 40's or early 50's, wise cracks to one of the bouncers "you don't have to card me, not with all this grey hair, hah hah." [Remember: this is IN FRONT of a state liquor control board officer, who could fine the bar on the spot... or shut them down.] Bouncer politely but firmly says "I'm sorry sir, today we are carding everyone, no exceptions, as per state regulations. ID please?"
The wise ass didn't have his wallet. He wasn't allowed in. (His companion was... with a big smirk on her face)
Last I saw of him, he was outside, talking emphatically with the bouncer... and a State College cop... who was reading him the riot act for being a smart ass.
So yes, I can believe that Grannie didn't get her booze if she didn't have ID on her.
It's in the bartenders guide to diplomacy.
pus engorged trowel toothed crotch pheasant
First misread it as "limped twatted" which would be the gender equal to "limped dicked" so a chuckle was had. Upon futher research urban dictionary claims twatted is very drunk and other reference to twatted as the past tense of tweeting.
Then I actually confimed "twattled" as written on second/third pass and a chuckle was had again.
Senior moments/General retardness is turning out to be a growth sector here.
rot
No, I forgot.