Hilarious Writing - Wine Site

[NY4Q]

I'll tell ya, whoever wrote these descriptions are spot on. I've cracked up off and on all afternoon after reading them.

http://www.bumwine.com/

[NQ6U]

Remember, though: the writers also sampled the wares.

[KG4CGC]

At 20% abv, Cisco will kick your **** in the dirt.

[NQ6U]

At 20% abv, Cisco will kick your **** in the dirt.

"Oh, Pancho!

"Oh, Cisco! Really, oh, Cisco. My head hurts..."

[KC2UGV]

At 20% abv, Cisco will kick your **** in the dirt.

That's where I sometimes aim with the wines I make. Generally, I get them to about 16 or 17% with the normal yeast, but when I want a little more potent batch, I use a mix of distillers yeast and the champagne yeast. Kicks it up to 19 or 20%, no distilling.

[PA5COR]

The descriptions of the alcoholic beverages is enough to stay sober for the rest of your natural life ;)

[NY4Q]

Well the first "review" I read there was concerning Night Train and I knew the fellow knew what he was talking about by reading the review. That shit will derail yore aiss prt'daelm quick..

[AE1PT]

Yup, seen the site before. Pretty accurate.

Drank a whole bottle of Thunderbird by myself once when I was 16. I have never been quite right since.

Drank a bottle of Richards (iced) in a black hootch bar called the Harlem Cab Stand in 1978. What happened next did not change my luck.

Fred Sanford is not the only one who can remember Ripple. I wish that I could forget it.

A word of warning: Don't smoke weed and drink Mad Dog unless you have a need to demonstrate projectile vomiting to your friends.

Don't drink Night Train unless you want to wake up somewhere you would rather not be. Be sure to sew your clothes on before you start.

According to the site, Boone's Farm may not be a 'bum wine', but I can testify that in my late teen years it certainly helped me get a lot of bum... :cool2:

Twist the cap, and spark it up!

[kb2vxa]

Yeah sort of. Piss weak watered down apple juice not my style, GF and I preferred to get catawbaized.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zH-cPckntEY

[AE1PT]

Yeah sort of. Piss weak watered down apple juice not my style, GF and I preferred to get catawbaized.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zH-cPckntEY

Yup. But not too much so. Old Pete becomes intoxicated at the same rate as the rest of the body.

Remember Mateus Rose? Pretty much the same MO as the Boone's Farm, but well suited to a nice Valium or two. Too much alcohol content is not good--and even deters the process--when one has twisted a decent number... :cool2:

[W3WN]

< snip >
Drank a whole bottle of Thunderbird by myself once when I was 16. I have never been quite right since.
< snip >Quit serving me straight lines!

Several political cracks come to mind, but I WILL resist... for now... else resistance is futile...

[AE1PT]

Quit serving me straight lines!

Several political cracks come to mind, but I WILL resist... for now... else resistance is futile...

You know, because of that bottle of hooch, I LEFT my innocence behind. Along with my underwear and right sock.

[WØTKX]

https://www.potsky.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/11/20121103-000028.jpg

[K7SGJ]

You know, because of that bottle of hooch, I LEFT my innocence behind. Along with my underwear and right sock.

There is no such thing as a wrong sock.

[AE1PT]

There is no such thing as a wrong sock.

That is incorrect. It all depends upon what use the sock is being put to. For instance, a coarse woolen sock is the wrong choice for knob polishing...

[K7SGJ]

That is incorrect. It all depends upon what use the sock is being put to. For instance, a coarse woolen sock is the wrong choice for knob polishing...

Since there are probably no shortage of callouses, and therefor, rug burn is not an issue, it must be you're having a problem with static cling?