View Full Version : Christmas ideas for the ladies
kf0rt
12-06-2010, 01:17 PM
What are the good ideas for gifts for the ladies this year? I already know what I'm getting, but need a cool idea or two for the XYL.
WØTKX
12-06-2010, 01:22 PM
errrr... red fishnets?
kf0rt
12-06-2010, 01:33 PM
Good idea, but was thinking more in terms of things that wouldn't have to be explained to the grand kids. :hahano::quiet:
W1GUH
12-06-2010, 01:38 PM
I sometimes get the impression that today's grand kids could explain a lot to us OF's!
WØTKX
12-06-2010, 03:42 PM
Send 'em to the spa in a limo! http://www.mokaraspas.com/denver/index.html
That gift that keeps on giving--a divorce.
KA5PIU
12-06-2010, 05:14 PM
That gift that keeps on giving--a divorce.
Hello.
Present? yes, I want one, my pimp ensemble needs a refresh!
Divorce? no, I would never consider a long term contract, and with the help even! ;)
Merry Christmas! ;)
N2CHX
12-06-2010, 06:00 PM
I'll take a good job for Christmas. Pretty soon I'll be whoring myself out if I don't find something else that pays better.
W2NAP
12-06-2010, 06:08 PM
give cash. thats the best i could come up with
kf0rt
12-06-2010, 07:35 PM
Send 'em to the spa in a limo! http://www.mokaraspas.com/denver/index.html
Damn good idea... She'd need a girlfriend to go with. Thinking...
kf0rt
12-06-2010, 07:37 PM
That gift that keeps on giving--a divorce.
Nah... I still like her. Besides, I'd have to change the beneficiaries on my non-existent wealth to the local Dumb Friends League.
kf0rt
12-06-2010, 07:51 PM
Well shoot...
Are you guys really all hat and no cattle? I got a GREAT wife, but I'm a typical male asshole and can never think on my own on this stuff. T-K-X-ray wins so far, but none of my wife's friends would play, and that's not a solo deal.
She's already got the e-toys, and money doesn't impress her.
I'm thinking a good selection of incense. Maybe...
W3MIV
12-06-2010, 08:11 PM
I'm thinking a good selection of incense. Maybe...
Easy for me. I incense her daily, or so she tells me.
KA5PIU
12-07-2010, 08:05 AM
give cash. thats the best i could come up with
Hello.
GIVE my Arse, get females in the house? 2 options.
1, they are sucking the life (money) out of you, or.
2, you are runnin' 'em for what they are worth!
Why do you think Santa wears that red fur pimp outfit?
That old fat one is just that, the old one.
Now the new one, screw the deer chit, he runs dears!
The magic dust that makes it fly? you gotta pay for that chit man!
Presents for the kiddos? sure, why not? a little candy and a ride?
Don't even get me started on the other hoildays. ;)
Halloween can be a real treat!
Bottom line is that the Republicans have taken over and they want us to run a free enterprise show!
Not that we have any choice.
N2CHX
12-07-2010, 08:37 AM
Some nice jewelry that she's been hinting at or anything else nice that she's talked about wanting for a while. Then cook dinner and do the dishes for her so she doesn't have to.
Signed book by her favorite author.
Collection of candies from her childhood.
New kitchen gadget if she is into that stuff.
A kitten or puppy.
Fine coffee, caviar or other such fancy food item that she loves, but does not get that often.
A sweeper or a broom.
Sewing machine.
New washer and drier.
Monogrammed aprons for the kitchen.
New stove, pots, pans and the like.
Copious ingredients for sammiches.
A sweeper or a broom.
Sewing machine.
New washer and drier.
Monogrammed aprons for the kitchen.
New stove, pots, pans and the like.
Copious ingredients for sammiches.
And where do we send the flowers for your funeral? :rofl:
And where do we send the flowers for your funeral? :rofl:
'DSG knows better, and she best get to making me a sammich. Last Friday I spent a lot of money on that woman at our favorite Mexican jernt, so payback is only fair. ;)
Hell, upgrading the kitchen (and the rest of the house) is her idea. You're more likely to get deaded were you to buy such frivolous things as diamonds for a gift.
WØTKX
12-07-2010, 10:36 AM
If you can handle it, go with her to the spa. I used to go along to this one: http://www.spaoftherockies.com/
N2CHX
12-07-2010, 10:54 AM
You're more likely to get deaded were you to buy such frivolous things as diamonds for a gift.
I knew there were multitudes of reasons I think 'DSG is awesome. Lots of women love expensive jewelry (hence my suggestion) but I'm pretty meh when it comes to that sorta thing. I appreciate the more practical things in life. To be honest I really don't even care about receiving Christmas and birthday gifts. If my kids and SO make me a card and do a little extra around the house, I'm quite happy with that.
I knew there were multitudes of reasons I think 'DSG is awesome. Lots of women love expensive jewelry (hence my suggestion) but I'm pretty meh when it comes to that sorta thing. I appreciate the more practical things in life. To be honest I really don't even care about receiving Christmas and birthday gifts. If my kids and SO make me a card and do a little extra around the house, I'm quite happy with that.
I take her out to dinner on the day.
Her gift for this year is a set of tritium combat sights for her carry gun. And a sight pusher for my toolbox, which will be used to install 'em. Afterwards, any excuses of misses are solely on her butt. :rofl:
I'm getting socks and boots (an old biker tradition, started years ago). There's a bit of double-dipping on my part here, but then again I don't get treated to a Dayton excursion (again, her idea...) for my birthday.
N8GAV
12-07-2010, 11:20 AM
I just ask my daughters what to get, thats easy for me because they are in their mid 20's and know what she likes or wants. Then I send them out to get the stuff and wrap it. I always get some small ring or something for her stocking now that I do buy for her, and she likes whatever I pick up.
NA4BH
12-07-2010, 12:35 PM
I got mine a wine fridge.
The boss informed me the other night that since we're spending $6K to remodel the kitchen, THAT is her Christmas Present and I don't have to get her anything else.
I'm in deep schickt. I don't think diamond earrings will cut it this year.
NA4BH
12-09-2010, 11:47 AM
The boss informed me the other night that since we're spending $6K to remodel the kitchen, THAT is her Christmas Present and I don't have to get her anything else.
I'm in deep schickt. I don't think diamond earrings will cut it this year.
If you don't get her something, you will find out just how deep that schicht is.
n2ize
12-09-2010, 12:12 PM
Well shoot...
Are you guys really all hat and no cattle? I got a GREAT wife, but I'm a typical male asshole and can never think on my own on this stuff. T-K-X-ray wins so far, but none of my wife's friends would play, and that's not a solo deal.
She's already got the e-toys, and money doesn't impress her.
I'm thinking a good selection of incense. Maybe...
You are on the right track... This Christmas shower her with...
1) Gold (lots of gold)
2) Myrrh
3) Frankincense
w3bny
12-09-2010, 12:54 PM
A toaster oven and a blendtech
A new vacuum cleaner and a nice mop.
w2amr
12-09-2010, 04:26 PM
A new vacuum cleaner and a nice mop.Ever see a man beaten to death with a vacuum cleaner? It's not a pretty sight.
KG4CGC
12-09-2010, 04:35 PM
http://ellen.warnerbros.com/2010/12/think_twice_about_this_gift_1203.php?sms_ss=facebo ok&at_xt=4d013577d29cc37a%2C0
kf0rt
12-09-2010, 05:56 PM
Ever see a man beaten to death with a vacuum cleaner? It's not a pretty sight.
Kinda what I was thinking. And my wife's birthday is this weekend, too (already taken care of).
Incense, check. Ordered her a build-it-yer-own-damnself bead bracelet (hear they're popular). Wishing now that I'd saved the Kindle for Christmas.
Been preaching "it ain't about the gifts" for 34 years now. I think she's catching on. My gifts (from her) have already arrived. Ordered that m'self. :dunno:
KG4CGC
12-09-2010, 05:58 PM
Ever see a man beaten to death with a vacuum cleaner? It's not a pretty sight.
Couldn't be any worse than the mop handle and the backside.
w2amr
12-10-2010, 03:50 AM
Kinda what I was thinking. And my wife's birthday is this weekend, too (already taken care of).
Incense, check. Ordered her a build-it-yer-own-damnself bead bracelet (hear they're popular). Wishing now that I'd saved the Kindle for Christmas.
Been preaching "it ain't about the gifts" for 34 years now. I think she's catching on. My gifts (from her) have already arrived. Ordered that m'self. :dunno:
After 38 years I have pretty much run out of original gift ideas. One thing I have learned. When in doubt, buy jewelry.;)
kb2crk
12-10-2010, 03:51 AM
After 38 years I have pretty much run out of original gift ideas. One thing I have learned. When in doubt, buy jewelry.;)
works every time....
Collection of candies from her childhood.
Brilliant one this!
It shows you care, shows you thought of her and shows you remember details.......
When Sheryl and I go here http://www.mastgeneralstore.com/ and I pick out handfuls of the candies she likes while she looks at their other 'stuff', I actually earn Bonus Points.
KG4CGC
12-10-2010, 03:47 PM
Then there is that device that rips out leg hair with great pain. Epilator? Good for the BDSM types but just plain useless for everyone else. You can still find these things at the As Seen On TV stores even though I thought they were taken off the market. Must be some kind of loophole.
The Epilady:
http://lh4.googleusercontent.com/public/BsaQxp4GjlWh3WUz-4wm3acghWUrZXw2dh4pGWZQEZsMZCK2E9mSfs54hkGbMU-MTho1ksusLwywXZJooLSaU2gAMjMv9k-_yQiMiiy47-bK2fdaaNF6btbK1M8kONvuy2Gbwxncf9-H5Nxb1j6-DI5NcBhUg2scCt6SFjJBE5Kwuo2vAT8
I'm surprised that any woman would ever use such a thing.
NA4BH
12-10-2010, 03:51 PM
http://www.sallyhansen.com/images/products/5070_11.jpg
Fun in a jar
KA5PIU
12-10-2010, 07:30 PM
The Epilady:
http://lh4.googleusercontent.com/public/BsaQxp4GjlWh3WUz-4wm3acghWUrZXw2dh4pGWZQEZsMZCK2E9mSfs54hkGbMU-MTho1ksusLwywXZJooLSaU2gAMjMv9k-_yQiMiiy47-bK2fdaaNF6btbK1M8kONvuy2Gbwxncf9-H5Nxb1j6-DI5NcBhUg2scCt6SFjJBE5Kwuo2vAT8
I'm surprised that any woman would ever use such a thing.
Hello.
When she gets you really POed put it on the back of her hair and turn it on!
I have thrown cats on peoples heads before, watching the cat trying to get purchase all the while clawing.
Liike the old saying goes, you may not be able to hit a girl, but there is so much more! ;)
KE7DKN
12-10-2010, 08:02 PM
Hello.
When she gets you really POed put it on the back of her hair and turn it on!
I have thrown cats on peoples heads before, watching the cat trying to get purchase all the while clawing.
Liike the old saying goes, you may not be able to hit a girl, but there is so much more! ;)
You're not funny. At all.
kf0rt
12-10-2010, 08:39 PM
Brilliant one this!
It shows you care, shows you thought of her and shows you remember details.......
When Sheryl and I go here http://www.mastgeneralstore.com/ and I pick out handfuls of the candies she likes while she looks at their other 'stuff', I actually earn Bonus Points.
We've got a Russell Stover store nearby. Holy Crap! If I wasn't halfway to diabetic, I'd put in an employment app.... Never been in there before, but it sure made me feel like I was 10 again.
XYL isn't much into candy, but she loves coconut and dark chocolate (not to excess), so I bought a couple boxes of RS coconut clusters.
And man, I need to be less of an asshole. Kid at the counter wanted to sign me up for a loyalty card and I balked. He wasn't speaking loud and I'm half deaf. I suggested that I could take the sign-up card home and he told me that it had to be filled out in the store. It was only then that I noticed he was handicapped. I've now got a Russell Stover loyalty card and a free sampler for signing up. REALLY cool store. HUGE and nothing but sweets. I'm not sure if I should call my doctor or my liquor guy given this new-found discovery. They're both out to kill me and now I have another option. :rofl:
Think I'm about done shopping. Check this out:
http://www.williams-sonoma.com/products/breville-milk-cafe-electric-frother/?pkey=cespresso-makers|eltespfrt
Might not be perfect, but it WILL be a surprise. ;)
When she gets you really POed put it on the back of her hair and turn it on!
I have thrown cats on peoples heads before, watching the cat trying to get purchase all the while clawing.
You must be big fun at parties, Rudy.
WØTKX
12-11-2010, 12:35 AM
Rudy... errrr Andy? :spin:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RY3oRVzjSIg
We've got a Russell Stover store nearby. Holy Crap! If I wasn't halfway to diabetic, I'd put in an employment app.... Never been in there before, but it sure made me feel like I was 10 again.
XYL isn't much into candy, but she loves coconut and dark chocolate (not to excess), so I bought a couple boxes of RS coconut clusters.
And man, I need to be less of an asshole. Kid at the counter wanted to sign me up for a loyalty card and I balked. He wasn't speaking loud and I'm half deaf. I suggested that I could take the sign-up card home and he told me that it had to be filled out in the store. It was only then that I noticed he was handicapped. I've now got a Russell Stover loyalty card and a free sampler for signing up. REALLY cool store. HUGE and nothing but sweets. I'm not sure if I should call my doctor or my liquor guy given this new-found discovery. They're both out to kill me and now I have another option. :rofl:
Think I'm about done shopping. Check this out:
http://www.williams-sonoma.com/products/breville-milk-cafe-electric-frother/?pkey=cespresso-makers|eltespfrt
Might not be perfect, but it WILL be a surprise. ;)
Already diabetic here, so yeah, a walk through any place like that is pretty much torture. We have a Russel Stover just a mile or two away from the house. They get bonus points for cruelty in my book as they also serve Mayfield Dairy ice cream and have a little spot where you can sit and enjoy a little break before you return to more candy shopping.
kb2crk
12-11-2010, 10:25 AM
Already diabetic here, so yeah, a walk through any place like that is pretty much torture. We have a Russel Stover just a mile or two away from the house. They get bonus points for cruelty in my book as they also serve Mayfield Dairy ice cream and have a little spot where you can sit and enjoy a little break before you return to more candy shopping.
they built it there just to torture you tom.......lol it is also right at I85
...... next door to Fuddrucker's!
Russel Stover has a blimp. No shit--I've seen it flying around these parts. Talk about your bad choice of methods to advertise a candy company...
KG4CGC
12-11-2010, 02:32 PM
Russel Stover has a blimp. No shit--I've seen it flying around these parts. Talk about your bad choice of methods to advertise a candy company...fatass
kb2crk
12-11-2010, 02:39 PM
...... next door to Fuddrucker's!
i thought that was ruddfuckers....
KG4CGC
12-11-2010, 04:27 PM
i thought that was ruddfuckers....
Negative. It is Pudfuckers.
Can you believe that after Fuddruckers was her for nearly 15 years, Bob Jones sent out a bunch of their students to protest their name. The owners all laughed! They were on camera telling the news crew that Fuddrucker is their family name and the poor BJU students were like, but it sounds like bleeeep! bleeep bleeep!
N7RJD
12-11-2010, 10:16 PM
That gift that keeps on giving--a divorce.
Promise?
N7RJD
12-11-2010, 10:20 PM
Hello.
When she gets you really POed put it on the back of her hair and turn it on!
I have thrown cats on peoples heads before, watching the cat trying to get purchase all the while clawing.
Liike the old saying goes, you may not be able to hit a girl, but there is so much more! ;)
I know some women that would love to meet you. Of course you would want to have your final arrangements
made prior to such a meeting.
Hello.
When she gets you really POed put it on the back of her hair and turn it on!
I have thrown cats on peoples heads before, watching the cat trying to get purchase all the while clawing.
Liike the old saying goes, you may not be able to hit a girl, but there is so much more! ;)
Is it any wonder you're single?
KA5PIU
12-12-2010, 12:54 AM
Is it any wonder you're single?
Hello.
The last time I went on a "date" this idiot decided to try and do a blind date.
This was at the Shoney's on I35 in San Antonio, don't worry, the day manager knows the story very well.
This blimp comes in looking for a Rutard, already on my bad side.
Anythow one of the coworkers says "Are you looking for Rudy?"
She comes over and says I am her date.
I took one look and said I did not order my steak on the hoof.
She grabs the plate I was eating from and proceeded to scream.
The manager comes over and tries to calm the screeching cow down.
She was asked to leave and so goes outside.
I was asked same and said I do not understand why I should have to leave, I am not the one causing the trouble.
The manager makes some noise about the police and says I need to leave.
I walk outside and run around the building, manager loses track of me but gets hold of the coworker.
The police arrive and I put it all on the coworker who, of course, has unpaid tickets.
Cow quickly figures out what car the coworker was driving and backs into it and takes off, in front of the police.
In the mean time I pay my tab and leave.
The manager screams to the cop that I did not pay and I hand the receipt to the cop.
By this time there are at least 5 cop cars.
I explain my situation to the manager and point out that the other person was arrested, not I.
After a few minutes I go to my truck and go back to work.
I find out who set me up and explain my position on horseplay.
A few days later somehow somebody used acid etch on every window and windshield of his car and magic marker everywhere else.
http://www.txrestaurantlocator.com/restaurant-details-Shoney%27s-San+Antonio--TX
Again, this went down so bad that everyone remembers it.
The latest visit to a bar was just a few hours ago.
Some Tejano bar where the females are just not available, as in hanging together and kissing.
I needs to find me some 3F females!
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