shorter butt wipe

[kc7jty]

Scott 1000 has joined the less revolution and shortened the width of their toilet paper rolls by 1/2 inch. Considering we got some really big ass holes in this country, I'm not sure if it will work for everyone.

[KG4CGC]

Scott 1000 has joined the less revolution and shortened the width of their toilet paper rolls by 1/2 inch. Considering we got some really big ass holes in this country, I'm not sure if it will work for everyone.
You don't know how to use the 3 shells?

[kc7jty]

Is that a Muslim thing?

[KG4CGC]

You're thinking about the three fingers used on the left hand.

[kd8dey]

Some folks might get antsy if you shortened their cobs by 1/2"

[W3MIV]

I would surely get antsy if anyone threatened to reduce MY cob by a 1/2 inch. The first shortening was bad enough and I have never forgiven that mohel, da schmuck, even though I was too young to know what was happening.

[w3bny]

Thats why I keep a Mouser catalog in the head

[WØTKX]

Some things are not luxuries, but a convenience.

http://www.binet.lv/go.pl?IMG=44617358O1014

[KA5PIU]

Hello.

As is being pointed out, most people are upset.
This does not fit properly in the holder, and for someone who may have spent thousands on a restroom remodel an ill fitting toilet roll may be downright upsetting.
For me? set it on top of the tank and be done with it!
I also think that a cart with a mini fridge with a microwave and toaster oven is a near complete kitchen!.
Note that while in transport the coffee pot is placed inside the microwave along with paper goods and plasticware.
The toaster oven is filled with dry goods and the whole thing is wrapped in a tarp with straps.
A full remodel would consist of buying a new one. ;)

[W1GUH]

Hello.

As is being pointed out, most people are upset.
This does not fit properly in the holder, and for someone who may have spent thousands on a restroom remodel an ill fitting toilet roll may be downright upsetting.
For me? set it on top of the tank and be done with it!
I also think that a cart with a mini fridge with a microwave and toaster oven is a near complete kitchen!.
Note that while in transport the coffee pot is placed inside the microwave along with paper goods and plasticware.
The toaster oven is filled with dry goods and the whole thing is wrapped in a tarp with straps.
A full remodel would consist of buying a new one. ;)

"For me? set it on top of the tank and be done with it!"

How many times have you dropped it in the bowl because it wasn't on the holder? Took me about a million times til I realized that all I gotta do is NOT put it on the tank. It's a real bummer to drop the WHOLE ROLL in the bowl when it's the LAST one!

[W1GUH]

Some things are not luxuries, but a convenience.

http://www.binet.lv/go.pl?IMG=44617358O1014

Some may opt for the option, extra:


http://hemorrhoids-home-treatment.com/images/B001U0OP46/51BN15qLKTL._SL160_.jpg

[kc7jty]

One of the reasons I use Scott 1000 is because it holds up when wet.

While away I'll sometimes use wetted paper hand towels balled up and stuffed in my mouth (to keep my hands free). I'll have to get someone to take video of me shuffling about with my pants around my ankles in the public loo with a mouth full of water soaked paper towels headed back to the stall.

[w3bny]

One of the reasons I use Scott 1000 is because it holds up when wet.

While away I'll sometimes use wetted paper hand towels balled up and stuffed in my mouth (to keep my hands free). I'll have to get someone to take video of me shuffling about with my pants around my ankles in the public loo with a mouth full of water soaked paper towels headed back to the stall.

Uhh...you do know that they make Cottonelle fresh wipes in small travel packs and single wipe pocket packs..right?

[kc7jty]

Uhh...you do know that they make Cottonelle fresh wipes in small travel packs and single wipe pocket packs..right?

Oh Yeah!!?? No shit, opps doesn't apply here.
I'd have to carry them every time I went out just in case, besides I'm too cheap to pay for something like that.

[w3bny]

Oh Yeah!!?? No shit, opps doesn't apply here.
I'd have to carry them every time I went out just in case, besides I'm too cheap to pay for something like that.

Lets see...truck-check...motorcycle tank bag-check...desk here at work-check...field tool bag-check...on flight carry on bag-check...

Especially here at work...with that gubment issue "John Wayne" paper

[kc7jty]

Ever chit in Mexico?
No potty seat.
Newspaper (if you're lucky)
Come in handy there.

[ab1ga]

"For me? set it on top of the tank and be done with it!"

How many times have you dropped it in the bowl because it wasn't on the holder? Took me about a million times til I realized that all I gotta do is NOT put it on the tank. It's a real bummer to drop the WHOLE ROLL in the bowl when it's the LAST one!

Used to do that once per calendar quarter until I proclaimed the "house rule" requiring not only that the seat be left down, but the lid as well.

Not because of the TP high-dives, but because the cats would carry chipmunks through the cat door, and one wound up in the toilet, failing to get purchase on the porcelain and treading water for dear life.

The tradition continues even though the cat door is long gone; bouncing rolls convinced me of the serendipitous wisdom of the "down and secure" rule.

[NA4BH]

Some may opt for the option, extra:


http://hemorrhoids-home-treatment.com/images/B001U0OP46/51BN15qLKTL._SL160_.jpg

That looks a lot like this

http://juliannejennings.webs.com/land%20o%20lakes.bmp

Don't get 'em mixed up.

[kf0rt]

"For me? set it on top of the tank and be done with it!"

How many times have you dropped it in the bowl because it wasn't on the holder? Took me about a million times til I realized that all I gotta do is NOT put it on the tank. It's a real bummer to drop the WHOLE ROLL in the bowl when it's the LAST one!

Never had that problem. You stand up to wipe?

My fatass has a pretty good seal on the bowl
when I reach around for another roll.

Never dropped a roll
in the bowl. Evah.

This is a pretty sick subject, gotta admit. But, this is the day and age where consumerism allows "enjoy the go" adverts for toilet paper (really? I mean, really???). Must be a high-profit item to be paying for all that prime-time air-time. I just wish we allowed it to be done with humor like those GD liberal Europeans. They laugh honestly, we skirt the issues.

TP here comes en bulk from Costco; whatever's cheapest. Nobody complains and they can buy their own if they don't like it.

Signed,
The asshole.

[KG4CGC]

I've had a cat once knock a roll in the bowl.
Had a drunk chick once knock a roll in da bowl.
She was the same one who turned her arm into a giant Q-Tip to go "tee tee."

[W3MIV]

Geez, what a shitty thread...

[NQ6U]

Geez, what a shitty thread...

A lot of gas, certainly. Be sure to log it before it goes down the crapper.

[kc7jty]

Oh, while I'm thinking of it, anyone ever use recycled toilet paper?
I know it's sterilized with chlorine but still....yuck.

[W4RLR]

One of the reasons I use Scott 1000 is because it holds up when wet.
It's John Wayne toilet paper. It's rough, it's tough, and it doesn't take shit off anyone!

[W4RLR]

Geez, what a shitty thread...That reminds me, I have to go to Lowe's tomorrow, and pick up twenty bags of manure.

[NQ6U]

That reminds me, I have to go to Lowe's tomorrow, and pick up twenty bags of manure.

Just go here (http://www.sarahpac.com/) and save yourself a trip.

[kc7jty]

Just go here (http://www.sarahpac.com/) and save yourself a trip.

I just donated $100. Small, I know but it's what's in your heart. You go girl!

[N7RJD]

You don't know how to use the 3 shells?

Is that anything like the guy that told his friend to use a dollar.
The friend comes out with it all over his hand and fingers. Guy
asks "didn't you use a dollar like I told you to?" The friend answers
"yeah, ever try to wipe your ass with three quarters, two dimes and
a nickel?"

[kc7jty]

He obviously should have used $1.25.

[KG4CGC]

Geez, what a shitty thread...
UT rated: 2 Thumbs Up!

[W3WN]

You don't know how to use the 3 shells?
Hah! Thank you. I liked that movie. It was dumb, dated, and had some pretty thick plot holes (to say nothing of a character or two that just disappeared... probably had their sub-plot edited out), but it had it's moments.

Remember: In the future, all restaurants are Taco Bells.

[KA5PIU]

Hah! Thank you. I liked that movie. It was dumb, dated, and had some pretty thick plot holes (to say nothing of a character or two that just disappeared... probably had their sub-plot edited out), but it had it's moments.

Remember: In the future, all restaurants are Taco Bells.

Hello.

You are charged one demerit of the morality code.
http://new.wavlist.com/movies/039/dman-fine.wav

[W1GUH]

Never had that problem. You stand up to wipe?

My fatass has a pretty good seal on the bowl
when I reach around for another roll.

Never dropped a roll
in the bowl. Evah.

This is a pretty sick subject, gotta admit. But, this is the day and age where consumerism allows "enjoy the go" adverts for toilet paper (really? I mean, really???). Must be a high-profit item to be paying for all that prime-time air-time. I just wish we allowed it to be done with humor like those GD liberal Europeans. They laugh honestly, we skirt the issues.

TP here comes en bulk from Costco; whatever's cheapest. Nobody complains and they can buy their own if they don't like it.

Signed,
The asshole.

"You stand up to wipe? " Oh, my, that's a terribly personal question! :shock: But, yea. I finally got tired of skid marks and decided to do a proper job of finishing up the "paper work". Haven't had anything even close to a skidmark now for at least 25 years! :twisted::neener: Now, aren't ya glad you asked!

And as for "putting the lid down".....Uh-uh! What real man puts the seat down?

:irked:

[NQ6U]

And as for "putting the lid down".....Uh-uh! What real man puts the seat down?

A married man who intends on staying married.

[kf0rt]

And as for "putting the lid down".....Uh-uh! What real man puts the seat down?

Any man with a big dog of the four-legged variety. ;)

[W1GUH]

Any man with a big dog of the four-legged variety. ;)

But.....he/she needs to drink! Just kiddin'. That's a really good reason to put the lid down. Or maybe not? Do dogs really care?

[kf0rt]

But.....he/she needs to drink! Just kiddin'. That's a really good reason to put the lid down. Or maybe not? Do dogs really care?

Actually, I think dogs LOVE it. Seems like my wife trained me early on the whole lid thing, and it appears to be nothing more than simple habit. Not worthy of sweat. For years, I hung the TP over, and she hung it under. No words ever spoken on the subject that I can recall, but some years ago, she switched. Either that, or I'm the only one who ever changes it any more. This may require further study. Not! ;)

[W4RLR]

Ever chit in Mexico?
No potty seat.
Newspaper (if you're lucky)
Come in handy there.Ever chit in Turkey? No TOILET, no toilet paper, just a hole in the floor and a faucet for washing your left hand after cleaning up.