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W3WN
01-21-2008, 11:26 AM
Many times in the past, I've done an homage in the April issue of my club newsletter to the W9BRD's old DX Hoggery & Poetry Depreciation Society, which was a semi-regular May feature of his How's DX column in QST.

Haven't run one for awhile because writing limericks is not my strong point.

I have a few stashed, not enough though... so I thought I'd give anybody here interested a shot at adding to the article.

The rules are simple:
-- It has to be a limerick. Nothing against other forms of poetry, but we're trying to maintain a low standard here.
-- It has to be funny. At least a chuckle.
-- It has to be "clean" enough to print in a family newsletter. "There once was a ham from Nantucket" just won't cut it.
-- It has to have something to do with the art of radio.
-- And most importantly: No personal attacks.

That last one is very important. I once got a whole selection of limericks from a fellow who had a beef with another fellow... they were funny, but pretty devastating. (If I'd printed them, I'd have been immediatly looking for a lawyer specializing in slander and libel!) And I've had a few submitted that consisted of bad-mouthing a particular equipment company, organization, net, or web site... not only were most not funny, but again, they were a thinly veiled personal beef being aired. Not something newsletter quality.

Oh yes, I almost forgot. Anyone familiary with Rod's old column knows that in almost all cases, the limerick spouter suffered an immediate demise. So if you submit a limerick that's used, YOU will be the one in print speaking your piece. So if you have a preferred exit (silver plated wouff hong, glowing rettysnitch, flying plate transformers) strategy -- in other words, how do you want to go? -- mention it, and if at all possible, it will be used.

You can send them direct to me at my newsletter email address (newsletter@n3sh.org) or post them here -- with permission of the board owners & moderators, of course.

No immediate deadline, as I'm still working on the February issue. I just don't want to wait until the last minute, I'm a bad enough procrastinator as it is!

73, ron w3wn

PS -- in case you were wondering, Rod Newkirk W9BRD is alive, well, and now spouting a VA3 call. And he is, or was, aware of this, as I've mailed him previous articles in the past. And you know, I'd swear he's still using the same mill to answer people on that he used in the days of his column 30 years ago!

01-22-2008, 05:46 PM
There once was an OM with a doublet
In the backyard of his house that they sublet
The ladderline did twist
And this did get him p***ed
So he said "I'll use coax in Phuket"

01-22-2008, 05:54 PM
There once was a man with a Yaesu
Who took his HT to the Bay zoo.
He worked Little Miss Muffet
Who sat on his tuffit
As she said "I enjoy DX too"

kf0rt
01-22-2008, 06:01 PM
There once was a man with a Yaesu
Who took his HT to the Bay zoo.
He worked Little Miss Muffet
Who sat on his tuffit
As she said "I enjoy DX too"

OMG! You silver tongued devil, Jerry. :oops:

WV6Z
01-22-2008, 09:09 PM
+1, very good one Jerry! :lol:

01-22-2008, 10:46 PM
There once was a girl who got Kenwood
Icom would not perform for her as it should
She keyed up the D-104
"Thanks for the QSO, QRZed more?"
Then the pileup lasted as long as she could.

WV6Z
01-23-2008, 12:26 AM
I bet Keith and I could come up with a gal who could fit that limerick in one guess. :twisted:

KC8TCQ
01-23-2008, 12:31 AM
I bet Keith and I could come up with a gal who could fit that limerick in one guess. :twisted:


heheh...

WV6Z
01-23-2008, 01:01 AM
:shhh

n2ize
01-24-2008, 05:43 AM
There once was a man with a Yaesu
Who took his HT to the Bay zoo.
He worked Little Miss Muffet
Who sat on his tuffit
As she said "I enjoy DX too"

I don't know exactly what a "tuffit" is but whatever it is it sounds like it might be fun. :lol: :mrgreen:

01-24-2008, 10:43 AM
One year I went out to do Field Day
With equipment I purchased on Ebay
Emptied pockets of lint
And put up the tent
Then the storm blew the tower onto Arr Jay

01-25-2008, 05:25 PM
There once was a website called teh Zed
"QRZ Forums Scheduled Outage In Progress" said Fred
So he downloaded DX Cluster
Then clamped down his sphincter
Just to make the place smell better instead.

kb2vxa
01-30-2008, 10:40 PM
Anal retentive, eh? :doh: :dance

n2ize
01-31-2008, 08:41 PM
There once was a ham named Brockett
Who put the wrong tube in the socket
His wife had the itch
To turn on the switch
And Brockett took off like a rocket

HUGH
02-07-2008, 08:35 AM
An engineer of great reknown
Put all his PICs in upside down

(I worked with him about 5 years ago).

W3WN
02-12-2008, 10:24 AM
There once was an OM with a doublet
In the backyard of his house that they sublet
The ladderline did twist
And this did get him p***ed
So he said "I'll use coax in Phuket"
Cute, but not printable in a family newsletter.

WV6Z
02-23-2008, 01:29 AM
Not a limerick, but family oriented.......

http://i226.photobucket.com/albums/dd302/wv6z/tnmary-had-a-little-lamb.jpg

N5RLR
02-24-2008, 12:39 AM
There once was a ham named Brockett
Who put the wrong tube in the socket
His wife had the itch
To turn on the switch
And Brockett took off like a rocket
To quote a denizen of another forum I'm on, "He blow'd up real good." :P

This was inspired by a lady ham I know. The name has been changed to protect the innocent/guilty:

"There was a young lady named Callie
For whom travel was right up her alley
Not a place in the world
Was unknown to this girl
She was better than Rand McNally." 8)

HUGH
07-25-2008, 02:17 AM
I hope this version of English is understandable:

There was a young farmer called Hyde
Who fell in a dung-heap and died
The next day his brother
Fell into another
So now they're interred side by side

08-06-2008, 10:40 AM
I hope this version of English is understandable:

There was a young farmer called Hyde
Who fell in a dung-heap and died
The next day his brother
Fell into another
So now they're interred side by side
There was an amateur radio operator named Hyde
Who was trounced in a pile-up and died
The next day his Mother
Went SK, and brother
After lightning strikes, anyone could be fried

08-06-2008, 10:49 AM
Limerick for other forums

There was a radio operator named Rob
Listening to Karol and his mob
Disgusted with their drivel
Of such cranial cripple
He decided to turn his radio ... uh... dial.